23 Dec Have strong values to guide you in life and always value yourself
The values that you hold and understanding your own value are part and parcel of personal development.
Your values help to define you as a person – and knowing your value protects your sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Understanding what you value, your own value, and the values you hold can help to guide you in life.
What you value
When understanding value and values, identifying your own values is the easy part. These are the things, people and ideas that you place importance on in the world.
Many people value their mobile devices, books, gadgets and gaming platforms. They value things that bring them joy or entertainment, that make life easier or that have emotional and sentimental value. You value your home and car, and belongings that you have worked hard for.
It is not just things that we value but people in our lives too – relationships with family, friends and significant others. We value time together, the things we get to share and the memories created.
“Tell me what you pay attention to and I will tell you who you are.”
José Ortega y Gasset
Recognising your personal value
You also must be able to see the value that you bring to the world. When you can recognise, identify and appreciate your value, and the gifts that you as an individual bring to the world, this can be a game changer.
Too many people do not feel worthy, or ‘good enough’. They feel as though they don’t measure up or have anything special to give. It is simply not true and yet it causes so much unnecessary pain. The sad thing is that people truly believe it.
Tackling this is integral to the Ignition Programme, which is a journey of personal development and discovery designed specifically for young people. The mission of Ignition is to empower people to discover who they really are and what they are naturally gifted and talented at.
Realising and sharing the value you have with the outside world will bring you a greater sense of self-worth. In adding value, you will then feel valued and be rewarded and recognised for the value that you bring.
It is an incredible feeling to discover that for yourself. By realising and sharing your value you can celebrate being you and start a whole new relationship with yourself and the world you live in. Yes, it is ok to be you. In fact, it’s awesome to be you.
Ignition exists to help you identify your fuel. Your individual fuel is what makes you, you and it is how you discover your natural gifts and talents. On the Ignition website, the ‘Discover your Bright Spark’ quiz offers a free way to discover what makes you naturally you. For a more in-depth analysis you can email me directly here.
“Your time is way too valuable to be wasting on people that can’t accept who you are.”
The value that individuals bring to the world
The value that you bring to the world, depending on who you, are could be:
• The gift of being creative
• Being an ideas/ inventive person
• Inspiring others
• Story telling or writing poetry
• Fashion or product design
• Speaking up for others
• Making others feel included by being a people person
• Being a performer
• Being a team player
• Supporting others
• Connecting people
• Being a peacekeeper
• Taking care of others
Value doesn’t have to be a specific skill. It can be a personality trait that makes people around you feel better, a way of thinking and working that supports others. Your value is you, and what you bring to the world.
Being calm in a crisis or ensuring fairness and that everyone is treated equally are important, valuable traits. Researching, planning, putting in place processes, putting in place improvements – all of these help other people.
Everyone has value and this is different for each of us. When you understand your value it will change the way you see yourself in the world, how you feel and what you do in both your leisure time and in the world of work.
As well as what we value, and the value that we bring to the world, we also have our values.
Your values: Setting a standard in life
Your values are your standards in life. What you need to feel to believe you are successful in the world. The sense of having meaning or purpose in the world. Values are like a set of rules we must meet to feel good.
The challenge for most people is that these rules are unwritten, silent rules. You gather them over time, consciously and unconsciously. These rules drive your behaviours and emotions. Often they are so silent you don’t appreciate them but if you break your own rules – you will be upset and disappointed with yourself.
If someone else breaks these rules you can react even if the other person has no idea they broke your rules, because they were unaware of them. It is incredibly hard to play by someone else rules when you don’t know what they are.
It is important to recognise that if you don’t know your own values and standards then how can you expect anyone else to? The result will be that you keep getting upset when someone violates your standards, when neither you nor them is really aware of what they are.
“It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”
Discovering your values: An exercise
To go on a short journey to discover your values, grab a pen and some paper. To get a list of the most important values in your life, you need to explore many areas of your life and see what values keep cropping up as important in all aspects of your life.
There are many techniques for discovering your values and this is just one of them, but it is a great place to begin. Here is a list of common values to think about and choose from, and you might want to add your own. Choose only the ones that are important to you, not because you think they should be important.
• Family connection
• Spiritual connection
• Emotional connection
• Making a difference
• Being the best
Now list the values that are most important to you in the areas of relationships, your health, and for work or school on three separate lists.
Once you have your lists go through and write out the most important ones, especially those that show up on all the lists. Then rank these in order of importance and create a list of the top five that are most important to you.
These are the values that give your life and relationships meaning and worth. Where you find satisfaction and purpose. Now see if you can identify which one value is the most important to you. This is the one value that you will try to meet in all things that you do, and the one that you will be most upset about if you or another violates it.
“Find people who share your values, and you’ll conquer the world together.”
Choose the life you want to lead
When you understand your top five values, you can understand what drives you and use them to create your own purpose. This is different for everyone – there are no right or wrong answers. Share with us on social what matters most to you:
When you know what you value, and the value you bring, and what values you hold – life can become very interesting and amazing.